I went to the doctor yesterday to quiet the near-constant harassment of a few dear friends over this blasted toe. And also to make sure I could go skiing this weekend.
The good news is that I was horrifically humbled. (no, do not applaud)
The bad news is that the doctor says I can't ski. Or walk, for that matter.
My pinky toe, the one-inch-short appendage, is kind of split right down the middle. Like, it's broken end to end.
This is bad.
What's worse is that with all my belly-dancing, gym workouts, and kung fu, I seem to have forestalled the healing process. Apparently, one's body only attempts to repair such damage for a limited time. If it is unable, the body simply applies it's energy elsewhere.
So, basically, the doctor warned me that I must stay off, Off, OFF the little thing for two weeks, and take these little pills, and behave myself. Then I have to come back and give him more money to X-ray me again. If I haven't been a good girl, he'll tell Santa. And Santa will be mad.
Actually, he didn't say that about Santa. I made that up.
What he did say was that if it hasn't begun to heal, we will have to take Drastic Measures. I don't know if that means that he will tie me down and put me in traction, or amputate the little thing. Either way. I have to skip belly-dancing this week, and so I am a little depressed.
You should have a bikini car wash to raise money for my medical expenses. And you should cook me meals and deliver them to my house. And send flowers.
Do you want a True Confession?
Part of me was delighted, in a perverse sort of way, that the doctor was so shocked at my ability to be Super Active Mom with a maimed toe. It made me feel very superhuman and powerful. I always have thought myself a wimp when it comes to pain. I feel better about that now. Like, maybe I could give birth without an epidural.
4 comments:
If I had only known that all one had to do was be a MEDICAL DOCTOR to get you to listen then I would have gone to medical school along time ago. tee hee hee
now, stay off that toe, young lady
~Dr.Juarez
hey, now that sounds so cool, Dr Juarez... hmmmmm
Seriously. You sound just like my mom. The first time we went on furlough she broke some bones in her foot or ankle or somewhere down there and she refused a cast and even continued to work cleaning houses. But she was "careful" and it sort of healed. Good luck.
HOW did you split your toe?
If I had only known that all I had to do to get some down time was split my little toe from end to end, I'd have done it months ago.
Seriously.
Well, let's see. Sounds like you need lots of movies. And popcorn. And you'll have oodles of time to blog great stories about your love life and your sordid past.
I can't wait!
I guess I have not watched too many belly dancers to see how they use their toes. Did they have toes?
I have long been told guys are whimps when it comes to pain and I being no exception! So, when I split my foot back in September, it was narcotics, immobilization, compression and elevation (NICE) - ok, that was a play on acronyms for all of you med types out there.....
Tell those boys you need pampered for the next several weeks! No more laundry, meals, cleaning, etc unless they do it and if they do not - no tv, games, whatever - maybe even double homework! Ok, that might add stress on top of your pain...
Heal up there kiddo! And be sure you are resting near your computer so you can still blog!
(is sordid a real word....?)
Post a Comment