I have these moments when I fancy myself some kind of rouge intellectual. Like when Yvonne talks about the time I used a multisyllabic word when I was three. This delusion makes me happy. I'd like to be one o'them smart folks. Kinda like being one of them there skinny folks.
But I am not.
This was recently verified by the arrival of my college transcripts. The ones that said "academic probation" on the front. The fact that it was 20 years ago, and I rarely actually went to class, is a small consolation. I was dumb in school.
My higher brain function, or lack thereof, came once again into sharp focus because of the new teller at the bank.
He looked familiar.
He was polite and professional, but I could see that same puzzled alarm I felt as he recited his pleasantries and wished me a nice day.
I swear I know him.
Or knew him once.
And I rather think I knew him well.
Like, maybe I dated him. Or my sister dated him. Only my sister is dead, which I find decidedly unhelpful in moments like this. She would be able to tell me....
So, after a week of wracking my sorry, befuddled brain, I approached him. I smiled. And said "Who are you?"
He said, "No? Really? You don't know?"
So, my face lit up with the expected recognition, and I said, "I really don't. I have no idea."
He told me his name. First and last. He told me about whatever happened to Mike and Chris. I have no memory of Mike or Chris.
And we laughed and chitchatted about our kids, and jobs, and how the time goes by!
I swear to you that I have a total and complete dearth of recollection about this man. Well, that's not exactly true. I do remember his name, and I have impressions of his mannerisms and his face and his voice. But I can't seem to assemble any real memories of him and his function in my past.
Maybe we robbed a bank together. Or perhaps I was in love with him. Maybe he was the mail man. It's hard to say. Very hard.
How is it possible that my brain works so unsatisfactorily? Could I get a refund? Do you think I could trade it in on a new model?
2 comments:
Would the new model be empty and you'd have to fill it up with knowledge and memories? Because if that's the case, stick with your "old" model. It may not serve you as well as you'd like but at least you KNEW you were supposed to know Teller Man.
I once told my parents I wondered if I was still under warranty as there were just too many problems with the current model. No sense of humor in parents.....
7 hours, tick, tick, tick and I will have to walk the aisle with oldest daughter. rehearsal was a little difficult.
kjp
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