I have something to say, which is very surprising considering that is what I do. I say things.
Today I want to say that divorce is a terrible thing.
This is because it creates ex-husbands.
In the Olden days of Israel, if a person committed adultery, they were stoned. To death. Until extinguished.
Voila! No ex!
I can see why God did it that way.
Some ex's (who shall remain nameless) get themselves stoned, but not unto death. Then they proceeded to become ...words, the likes of which my Christian lady friends rarely use. Although, today a few of my friends have graced my ears with rare exceptions.
I vote for Capital Punishment in the event of either adultery or abandonment. Really. I don't think we should be picky about the whole stoning idea. I mean, what with technological advancement, we have the tortures of the ages to draw upon for inspiration. We could have them hanged, drawn and quartered. Or boiled in oil. It could be like a page from Foxe's Book of Martyrs! We could have a new book and call it The Ends of Exes. The proceeds from the sales could go to support the widows.
This is my idea. Does anyone have a better one?
3 comments:
as long as widowers can benefit from the sudden demise of their "ex", I'll vote for it! woohoo! an artist's life for me.....
(though I have to admit I pity her more than want her dead)
kjp
I am totally cool with the idea as long as it is not gory. I once made the mistake of going to the Inquisition Museum in Spain with my dad. I had NO idea of all of the creative ways there are to torture a human. Stay away from that museum unless you want nightmares.
OR, we could make the exes wear chastity belts. The real kind are most certainly a form of torture. Would that be an alternative?
I think a full featured movie would be better, then you could sell DVD's, and the opening weekend alone would probably take care of a lot of back alimony and child support.
You really make me think.
Thanks
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