Bored Christian Housewives

I went on a date, a long time ago.
It was in 2004.
February, I think.
This grand event caused such a hullaballoo among those who know me. I remember telling one of my friends a glorified blow-by-blow tale of all that occurred. How we had made-out in the moonlight after an outrageously expensive dinner. How we had gone to a local bar to drink, and then been pulled over by a police officer on the way home. There was more to the story, but I can't recall just what,. Those are the main points.
Now, my friend laughed at my rediculous tale, knowing that it was my way of telling her to mind her own business. But she also commented at the time that there may indeed be truth to the story. And there was. But it was all exagerated beyond recognition.

Today I had a similar twisted tale unfold before my ears. This time I was on the receiving end. It was about me and a man and an exageration that bore no real resemblance to reality.

I commented to a sweet friend of mine about an email that I received today. I happened to be opening my inbox while I was on the phone. This email involved cheesecake.
Sweet friend #1 then spoke to sweet friend #2 regarding said cheesecake. The subject of my email came into their conversation and took on a life of it's own.
The tale sprouted vertabrae and facial hair as it evolved from the primordial nothingness. When it was fully emerged it looked way more like a marriage proposal than a dessert, to say nothing of its origins as a humble email.
Friend #2 then called me fast as you please. She was positively salivating with the delicious morsel of gossip that she had imagined into life.
It makes me feel like I am being followed by vultures. They are waiting for my carcass to drop so they can gorge themselves on the carnage.
Seriously.
It was a witty note that made me laugh. That's all.
What am I going to do if I ever do have a racy secret, or a love life to talk about?
...That's right!
I am going to keep my mouth firmly shut.