More than a tithe

There is nothing like balancing the checkbook to add a strong dose of perspective to one's spending habits. My spending habits need to be reevaluated. For instance, I place a strong urgency upon hunger pains, as evidenced by my tendency to eat out. This would be a logical thing to cut out in my supposed quest to lose weight. Why do I see an empty stomach as a problem to be remedied? There is no chance at all of me starving before the next meal. If only I'd embrace that feeling of emptiness, I'd save money and shed unsightly jiggle. How very efficient that would be.

My checkbook register also reveals that I buy far too many clothes. In my (admittedly weak) defense, I would like to point out that I often buy clothing for the children. Also, I frequently buy second hand or clearance. But, there is an alarming percentage of my discretionary spending which goes straight to the closet. Now that we mention this, I realize that it could be partly due to that eating problem disclosed in paragraph one. I need clothes that fit, these ones no longer do, QED: Momma needs to go shopping.

I'm seeing a pattern here. Eat less, exercise more, save money.

My grandfather used to say that every day you chose to stay at home, you save at least three dollars. This is partly due to the gas money saved, and partly due to the propensity for spending that seems to be bound to the very concept of going anywhere. Staying at home could be a lucrative investment.

I really have gotten quite in the habit of going where I want to go and getting what I want to have. I'm careful. Kind of. I really do look for deals, but I'm not sure that's enough. There is something so intrinsically self indulgent about the way I go about my spending.

When I was a single mom, I use to weight every purchase so carefully. Things I give no thought to now were expenses I had to think about back in those days. Toilet paper seems expensive when there's only five dollars in your pocket, and a week until payday. I was far more aware that every cent I had was precious. Any money was a gift from God, and I spent it like it was a Holy Trust. It was.

It still is, only I've allowed that reality to slip my mind. Every penny is important. If I am squandering my purse, I may well be missing an opportunity. If I can return to a sense of wonder and responsibility for the money allotted to me by God, then I am certain to live with a much greater gratitude and a more mindful way of spending.

Isn't it good to remember that? It's all God's. I am simply a steward. A chubby, self indulgent, bargain shopping steward.....